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I was 13 years old when I first heard about Jesus. Before I came to know the Lord, my upbringing was as a Buddhist, but I did not really practice it. When I was small, I would join the other family members for certain Buddhist religious occasions but I did not find any true meaning to the worship rituals. I grew up questioning myself: “Who created God?”, “Who is God?”, “Where do human beings come from?”, “Who is the Head, the most Superior one amongst all the gods in my religion (in Buddhism)?”.

These thoughts kept me wondering but I never found an answer to those questions. At that time, my concept of God was that “the gods” are to be feared and to be pleased with offerings, and the burning of incense and joss sticks.

Because I had so many questions and doubts in my head even when I was a little kid, God answered my curiosity when I was in Form 1. During my first year of secondary school, a few friends invited me to go for a school Christian meeting. I told them I was not  a Christian, but they persistently invited me and told me I was fully welcome even if I was not a Christian. I went along, and that was when I heard the name of Jesus for the first time. During the meeting, a senior student by the name of Gladys shared her testimony about how she wondered about who God was (just like me) before she became a Christian, and how God saved her from her sinful life.
She opened the Bible, and shared the verse from John 3.16, “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life”. And for the first time, I heard the word LOVE and not FEAR. In Buddhism, I was not taught that I am loved. In Buddhism, I was not told that Buddha had sacrificed anything for me. But this senior girl Gladys told me that Jesus died for me so that I could get eternal life simply because God loves me.

That day, we sang the song “Amazing Grace” (I knew the lyrics because ithey were written on the black board):

“Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me!
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind but now I see.”

I sang along, feeling somewhat at peace in my heart. At that time I did not fully understand the meaning of “Jesus died for me”, but I was overwhelmed with emotion because I was told that God loves me. The meeting ended and I went out with teary eyes, and continued crying in the school toilet. I felt peace and comfort in my heart.

From that moment, I wanted to know more about this Jesus that they were talking about. One of the students led me to Madam Iris Lim, the school librarian, who was a Christian. She spent time talking and listening to me, explaining to me about God and that the only way to be saved is through believing and accepting His Love and Grace through His Son Jesus Christ. In January 1994, I said my own words of prayer acknowledging Jesus as my Saviour.

My mother saw that I was interested in becoming a Christian. She saw that I was happy and I even told her about Jesus. However, she did not show any further interest to know more, but, she was the one who bought my very first Bible..

I spent my secondary school days joining the Christian Youth Society, and then went to one of the Anglican Churches in Kuching. I was baptized in the water at Lundu Beach by one of my born-again school teachers when I was 14; I did this by my own will and with full awareness that it is a step of confession to God that I am leaving behind my old self and accepting His Grace for me in my new life as a Christian.

When I started working, I was introduced to brother John See and family by my husband. I was very encouraged to know and learn more about the Word Of God when I was with the Kuching Christian Assembly. The Word of God is the main agenda of every meeting there. How happy I am to know that I have found a true, bible-believing Christian group in the midst of Kuching. I also learned about the head covering for the women in  Christian meetings, and the error of speaking in tongues and the celebration of Christmas and Easter in the “Christian world”. I did not know all these things even though I was saved as a teenager.

God did not leave me in the beginning, and He does not leave me even today. Indeed, we serve an everlasting and loving God. He listens, while we are still sinners.

This is my favourite verse from the Bible: God said to Jeremiah, “Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee...” (Jeremiah 1:5).

God loves each one of us even before we are born. Because of God’s love for us, He sent His only son Jesus Christ to this world to be tortured, tormented and to die on our behalf so that we do not have to experience hell. Jesus did not have to die, yet He died willingly on our behalf so that you and I can have eternal life.
How blessed I am, because by His Grace I know that I am saved.

I want to introduce my daughter to this wonderful Saviour. I always tell her about God, even if it does not fully make sense to her now.
I pray that one day, she too would experience the grace and love that God has for her.

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